Thursday, September 8, 2011

Adventures in GPSing



  Driving home from way downtown this morning, my GPS decided that traffic on the 405 was a bit backed up (I know, I was shocked, too) so I was re-routed. Via the magic of crazy satellite technology, our GPS units have become almost self-aware, and sometimes they frighten me. I was taken on such a ridiculous route, that sometimes I wondered if the thing was just messing with my head. How much should we trust these damned things? Will they take over the planet one day? Here's a typical drive home for me:

GPS: Keep right ahead.
ME: But the freeway is to the left. That's strange.
GPS: Now, turn right, then turn immediate left.
ME: Uh, okay. This is a residential area. Sure the freeway's not faster?
GPS: Turn right in 20 feet, then-
ME: That's a parking lot.
GPS: Please don't interrupt me when I'm speaking.
ME: Uh...okay.
GPS: Continue through the parking lot and enter the Arby's drive through. You look hungry.
ME: Actually, I just ate.
GPS: Arby's.
ME: Okay. Uh, do you...do you want anything?
GPS: I'm a GPS, moron. After you finish your curly fries, turn left and proceed through the field for one quarter mile, then turn right.
ME: Pretty sure that's just illegal.
GPS: Do you want to get home or not?

  Technology, people. Be cautious.

3 comments:

  1. Remember that time your GPS took you to a bathhouse and you were like, "But I'm not really a gay man..."

    BTW, did switching it over to a woman's voice actually help like you thought it might? You gotta just learn to say no.

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  2. Wuddn't my voice. My GPS though, so of course it has food on the brain. DUH...

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  3. Your first problem is you're trying to talk to your GPS. Just surrender and be it's bitch like the rest of us :)

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