Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Snoverkill



  I'd love to take credit for that clever little wordplay, but I got it from a cute girl who in turn got it from a cute news agency.
  I've had so little human interaction over the last few days that I'm going a little bit insane. Sunday morning, after the BIG storm cleared out, I went out to survey the dumpage on my driveway and found it was over my knees. As badass as the Jeep is, I knew it couldn't push that much snow. My elderly neighbor was just beginning to shovel his driveway (a tiny peck at a time) and offered me a spare shovel, since I'm still too stubborn to buy one.
  I shoveled the thing down to about four inches, which I knew I could easily clear in 4WD. Then, I went over and shoveled about 85% of Chuck's driveway, right down to the 'crete. He was worried that if any was left, he or his wife might slip and fall. During the shoveling, he proceeded to tell me about everything that has happened to every human being in the world since 1920. Once you get him started, you can't stop him. I struck him with the shovel several times, but even that had no effect.
  I went to the store later that day to restock, and it was really surreal. About 50% of the parking lot was taken up with what I've started calling "snow castles." They're about eight foot high cubes of snow that the front-end loaders have shoved to the side to clear room. They are massive burgs, and I can't imagine how long it's going to take for them to melt.
  Inside the store, I found many shelves emptied. The meat department was completely bare, as were the milk coolers.
  Monday was called off, job-wise, so I sat at home. Tuesday followed with similar results. Our latest storm rolled in last night and danced on us all day long, putting down another heavy layer of snow on top of this disaster. Today was called off too obviously, but I ventured out tonight into the nastiness to go to my voice lessons. All the other students had cancelled, I was told, and I was the only one insane enough to try it. I won't kid you, the conditions were very ugly. I actually got stuck in my driveway, thanks to Mr. Plow rolling about three feet of snow into my drive, but I had myself dug out in about ten minutes. I learned that bravado and a heavy foot can't help you when you have most of the Arctic Circle wedged under your transmission.
  There was no place to park when I got to the lesson, so I just ditched my Jeep on some flat ground and hiked into the completely unplowed area. The wind was howling, blowing ice into my face, and the snow was almost up to my waist in some places.
  I made it home, eventually, and here I am, settled in again. Work has been called off for tomorrow, and I expect to see the same on Friday. Crazy, crazy time.


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